AMAZING thoughts for the day

I have thoughts like this every day of my life. <3 The idiosyncraisies of english part of course...the best ones are in the middle, and the one on braille! :D

FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH: Please enjoy the following 1. DON'T SWEAT THE PETTY THINGS AND DON'T PET THE SWEATY THINGS.   2. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR.   3. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.   4. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?   5. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.   6. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, "WHERE'S THE SELF- HELP SECTION?"  SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE. 7. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?   8. IF A DEAF CHILD SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP? 9. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?   10. IS THERE  ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?   11.  WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?"   12. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?   13. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES?   14. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?   15. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?   16. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?   17. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS?   18. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?   19. WHY DO THEY PUT BRAILLE ON THE DRIVE-THROUGH BANK MACHINES? 20. HOW DO THEY GET DEER TO CROSS THE ROAD ONLY AT THOSE YELLOW ROAD SIGNS?   21. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?   22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.   23. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?   24. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY?   25. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?   26. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO?   27. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?   28. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?   29. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT?   30. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED "HEMORRHOIDS" INSTEAD OF "ASSTEROIDS"?   31. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN'T SHOOT AT THEM?   32. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM?   33. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL PERSON IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DO THEY BECOME DISORIENTED?   34. CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD?

Otter Pops and Me

Since I've eaten at least 20 of these (or a Smith's version of them) in the last two days, I thought I'd pay a tribute to them. They are otter pops. They are amazing. I have fond memories at gymnastics summer camp where I'd try and scrounge up 75 cents for one of them.

Did you know they have a website?

Did you know that they produce video's AND songs?

AND! Did you know they are involved in staged age old debates?

Well...if you didn't, please do a google search on them. It's quite fascinating. Otter Pops. Not only for eating any longer.

Automne

I had to wear a sweater to school today cause it was cold. I thought to myself whilst eating oatmeal from a cup, "It sure feels like it's not summer anymore". It just so happens that it isn't summer anymore! According to the all-knowing Peanut's gang calender that I own, it is now the first day of Autumn! It is also called Automne and Herbstanfang...but I prefer English for obvious reasons. Anyways...Fall is basically the best season that there is! And I therefore have to make sure to write about it! :D Fall!

The Killer Milton

October 4th is coming up...and we all know what THAT means~! That's right! I'm drawing a new picture! :D ...and General Conference :D


This is who I want to draw this time! :D It was either him or Harrison Ford...but my love for Economics beat out my actor heart throb of when I was 8. This is Milton Friedman! He is definitely my role-model! But sadly I don't have the materials needed to do him justice...so instead I am going to do an artistic version of this picture of the killers! Milton must stay a want for now...but the killers are far from a bad substitute. I'm so excited! I love the killers! :D

Remember

I did a google search, as I am prone to do, on the word 'remember'. Results: A Walk to Remember, Remember the Titans, A quote from Mufasa on the lion king to 'Remember', and even Twilight star Robert Pattinson had his own little diddy about it! But none are important enough to link to on this day.

So please. Remember.

Nevermind...

My room mates whom this post is concerned with don't read my blog yet I believe, so I'm going to go ahead and speak without reserve.

I could have been here today. Isn't it gorgeous!? (like a gorge hahaha) Just LOOKING at this picture takes away all the sad things in this life and fills me with ever extending wonder. The majesty! The color of the water! Being able to wade through a river! Such things would bring me such happiness. Not just a slight happiness either. I've dreamed of going here since I saw a picture in my dentist's office. It was a picture of himself looking up at the narrow's extenuating walls in all of the Narrow's glory personified in that one picture. I wanted to have a picture like that. I wanted to GO. But alas, my desires are thwarted again. Again I am left behind to live my life without the majesties of this world to accompany me. Life is still great, to be sure...but such bitterness I have yet to know. 7 hours before we were to leave for the trip my room mates changed their minds and didn't want to go.

But what I told them when they revealed to me their designs was the truth. I saw their feelings in their eyes and I could not bring them pain that I knew would come if I was selfish. They did not want to make the commitment to go-an all day excursion if pursued-and they feared for their grades if they did so. They didn't feel prepared, which I'll admit we weren't the in the best of prepared-ness, and didn't know enough to go on this great adventure that I myself had concocted. So I chose not to go today. I told them the truth when I said that we shouldn't go. There was not a drop of insincerity when I spoke of my desire not to go. So I didn't go.

Maybe some other time Narrow's at Zion's National Park. Hopefully a better one.

A Vappous Rant

I would be speaking tortiloquy if I were to say that things are going well. I feel like everyone is playing piladex with me ( ok, really it's all in my head), and no matter how much I strive to be an inveteratist, I still just feel like throwing a sinapistic muffin at everyone. It would seem, in reality, I'm being overly tenellous at the moment. I am. Perhaps I should go give blood...I'm sure they have a dromograph at one of the blood donor places. Or I could help someone out by buying them a scandiscope! Well, I'm sure it would help someone who owns a recineration house...or I could just cook my favorite meal...lardlet and steak! :D Grilled to perfection! That would help me feel better...

Vocab Cheat Sheet:

scandiscope-device for cleaning chimney's
recineration-second time a thing or place is burned down
tortiloquy-dishonest or immoral speech.
dromograph-instrument for measureing velocity of blood flow.
vappous-flat, bland.
lardlet-small piece of bacon used to enrich meat.
pamphagous-eating or consuming everything.
sinapistic-consisting of mustard.
tenellous-somewhat tender.
piladex-game where an inflated bag is hit with hand to keep aloft.
inveteratist-one who resists reform; one who holds to tradition.